"Dojo! Casino! It's all in the mind!" -Chop-Chop Master Onion, "UmJammer Lammi" Legal Crap Mystery Science Theater 3000 & the related characters are owned and copyrighted by Best Brains Inc. Final Fantasy Tactics and Chrono Trigger are copyrighted by SquareSoft Wild ARMs is copyrighted by Media Vision or Contrail, the latter being the newer name for the company. Any other thing I forgot to mention is copyrighted to it's owner(s). Please don't sue; I have no money as is. ~.~;; "Messila's Journey" is owned by the ever-dear Dr. Thinker. No offense and bad stuff is intended with this MST. No mysterious priests were harmed in the production of this MSTing... OK, I lied. Chibi-chan's notes (a.k.a. Other Stuff) Uh... sleep is happy. X.X With that out of the way, Here we gooooooooooooo!! ------------------------------------ (Singer) In the not too distant future, (Methinks it was next Thursday) A bunch of poor suckers Have some hell to pay! A group of evil people, led by Mala-chan, They were bored one day, so they dreamed up a plan. They choose some people they didn't like, Then they sent those poor victims into space and- *B-ko cackles* (Mala-chan) We'll send them crappy fanfics, As many as we can find! (Lalala!) (Marle) They'll have to sit and read them all! (Dycedarg) And they'll slowly lose their minds! (Lalala!) (Singer) Now keep in mind they can't control Where the fanfics begin or end. (Lalala!) To try to keep their sanity, Upon each other they must depend! RIFFER ROLL CALL! Rini! (I gotta BELIEVE!) Rudy! (NO PARAPPA!) Ramza! (Why me?) Lucca! (I'm BRILLIANT! ^_^) Jaaaaaaaaaack! (Oh bugger...) If you're wondering how they eat and breathe And other science fact, Just think to yourself, "It's just a file, I should really just relax, For 'Idiotic Fanfic Theater Whatever' *Twang!* [The... uh... satillite. ^^;;] *The entire crew stands on the bridge. Rini, Rudy, and Lucca are celebrating, the others sulking* Rudy: What can we say? The people have spoken! ^_^ Rini: Our 43% whupped your, what, 18%, in the polls! ^_^ Lucca: In your FACE, you three! ^_^ Ramza, Jack, and Charlotte: *grumble*mutter*bite me*mumble* *The yellow button flashes. Hanpan presses it* ------------------------------------------ *An upset Zelgadiss Greywords walks before a dismal background* Zelgadiss: I would just like to say that I refuse to work in that _evil_, _EVIL_ woman's Caption Gallery until _she_ apolgizes for all those captions of me- *ZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!* Chibi's voice: LIKE HELL, YOU WON'T! Zelgadiss: *Fried* I hate you. Announcer: The moral? Resistance is futile against an Author. _Any_ Author. This has been a Narrative Causiality Reminder. *A shooting star followed by "The More You Know (About the Rules of Narrative Causiality)" goes to the center of the screen and stays there* ------------------------------- All but Rini: ............... Rudy: Dude, that's messed up. Rini: *shrug* Rules are rules, kiddo. *The red button flashes* Jack: Hoo boy, Nana, Saki, and Mio are calling... *Presses the button* [Evil Central] Mala and Marle: *To Dycedarg* You're Saki. B-ko: Oh, I'm Mio! MEMEME! ^_^ Cecilia: *Mutters from her hiding place* more like nana... [SOL] All: *Anime sweatdrop* ..................... ~.~;; Lucca: Can we just get on with the Invention Exchange? [E.C.] Mala-chan: Oh, why certainly! ^_^ [SOL] Lucca: Finally! Anyway, *Takes out a large metal box* This is the "Become an Angst-Ridden Main Character" kit! It comes with three wigs, *Takes out three spiky blue, blonde, and red wigs out of the box* a book of psychological disorders to choose from, and a catalog of childhood-to-early teen traumas to give one reasons to be distant, moody, and an overall royal pain in the ass. ^_^ Squaresoft has already given me offers on it if I want to sell it. [E.C.] Dycedarg: Off course. B-ko: You call _that_ an invention?! Mine's ten times better! *Looks around* ... it's GONE! O.o;; Cecilia: *Lurking in the shadows with the invention* Mw'hahahaha! B-ko: Um, that is... It's... The Beat-Me-Up Dycedarg! *Beats the crap outta Dycedarg* [SOL] All: *Anime sweatdrop* ...................... Rini: Great, we've surpassed our elipse quota now. ~.~;; [E.C.] Mala-chan: *sigh* Anyway, you're fic today is part five of "Messila's Journey". Merry Christmas to all, and to all some MAJOR PAIN! [SOL] *Lights flash and klaxons go off* Jack: WE GOT THINKER SIGN! *Door sequence: Door 6: Dogbone door. Opens automatically. Door 5: It's Lammi and Rammi! Rammi smashes Lammi over the head with her guitar as you go past. Door 4: It's Squall and Solid Snake sitting on a bench. After gawking in disbelief at Squall's ineptitude at talking to women and snickering discreetly, you move on. Door 3: It's your normal run-of-the-mill drawbridge. It falls out towards you, barely missing you. Door 2: It's Peter Pan. He's revived Tinkerbelle from the last time and is trying to get payment as you runs past. Door 1: It's a wall. Tinkerbelle comes, waves her wand, and an opening appears. Seating (L-R): Ramza, Rini, Rudy, Lucca, Jack* >Good News: When I get a idea. I will start on the next part. All: *Blandly* Yippee. >Bad News: Trouble, my brother take away the book that was helping >me write my stories. Sorry, from Part 5 on, please parden my bad >spelling. Rini: We always do anyway... Rudy: We'd much rather have your fics than certain ones we've had in the past... *shudder* Voice: Which reminds me; "FFVII: TUS" part 3 is almost done... All but Rini: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! ((O.O));;; Rini: I take it that's a fic none of you wanna see. >BETTER NEWS: Since American is bigger then Japan in fact. I >decide on giving more common place monsters. When I do make a new >monster. Ramza: Wow... Thinker is a deep man... *Lucca lewdly giggles* HEY! >----------------------------------------------------------------- >Messila Journey >Part 5 - Chips Off The Old Rockets. Rudy: A.K.A. what happened when Rini got PO'ed at someone who was turned to stone seconds within irking her. ^^ Rini: *growl* Rudy, shaddap. >by Dr. Thinker >---------------------------------------------------------------- Jack: Boy, are Hansel and Gretel in for it after the birds eat those... >Charamander is getting bored. He just fighted elven Pokemon >trainers in a row. Xelloss: *Appears* Fought _how_? *WHAM!* Lucca: Chibi? Voice: Right- Rudy: *evil grin* Wait. Let him stay. Sitting through this might teach him to stay the hell outta here. ^_^ Voice: That's mean. That's evil. I like it! He stays for this part! Xelloss: Say WHAT?! I mean, very well, I'll stay. ^_^;;; >Messila was getting a catch a very little Ponyta with out a Pokeball Ramza: Um... "Kick, punch, chop, I got the funky flow"? >-- Trainer Slang for a weak voice. Xelloss (Cartman): WEEEEEEEEAAAAAK! >_< >Iris told that she will been the once to commands to Pokemon in >fight until either her voice get better or we get to the next >town! Jack: *Hypnotized by the incoherency* Your wish is my command... Xelloss: *Slightly pained, but hiding it well* Oh? ^_^ *WHACK!* Rudy: He may be an idiot, but he's still my friend! You even _think_ about trying something and so help me, I'll make you read "FFVII: TUS" and "Chibi Usa's Seventh Birthday" UN-MSTED! Xelloss: *!!* ... never you mind, Mr. Van Burace... ^_^;;; >Charamander nod its head in agreement. Iris used her super >potion and Charamander was well again. Lucca: Say, when did she junction Alexander? >"What?" Messila asked weakly.. Rudy (Wayne): Asphinctersaywhat? Rini (Messila): What? Rudy (Wayne): Exactly. ^_^ >"What did you said what for?" ask a confused Iris. Jack: *Out of it* For the BARRELS! THEY'RE ALL AROUND ME! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! Lucca: Great, now he's channeling Ashton's favorite dream. >"See foryourself." Messila replied weakly >In near a thorn brushings, a semi-truck with a trainer on the >door. Xelloss (Truck driver): Can we hide the body here, Zeke? Ramza: I wanted to say that... *pout* >"It must be those Team Rocket!" Iris said "I going to try here >Pokemon into dust! "I don't know if they are hear. But just in >case, be quiet as mouse!" Rudy: I guess it's better than being "Hungry Like the Wolf"- *WHACK!* Xelloss: *Pulling his staff away from Rudy's head* Watch it, boy. *insidious grin* ^_^ >"Pikachu." Messila remark weakly. Ramza: Just watch out for their Pika Pi attack; you'll never get the smell out of your clothes. ^^ Rini: Ugh, RAMZA! >.< >"Rattata." retorted Iris. >"Oh. Ok." Messila whisped. Jack: *Still out of it* Dojo, casino, it's all in the mind! Lucca: Um, should we help him? Hanpan: Nah, just give him another paragraph and he'll be fine. >----------------------------------------------------------------- Ramza: The Pika Pi attack! DUCK! *Ducks* Rini: *sigh* This time, it's just a line, Ramza. Ramza: You never know with _this_ place! ^^;; Rini: True... >The door of the back was open, as soon as Iris and Messila was >inside Inside was a pile of transparent chips. After a while, >they heard voices coming from the head. *Xelloss and Lucca laugh hysterically* Rudy: I don't think we need to say anything for those with dirty minds. *chuckle* Ramza: That's for sure. *snicker* Rini: *Slowly shakes her head* I'm surrounded by perverts... >"Greetings, Ronald. Any problems get Jukar pokemon." Jack: *Recovered* o/~ Juuuukar/ Juuuukar/ It's a party in a can... o/~ >"Yes. Police Officers find those chips on those two kids from >Pakar." Rudy (voice): Dammit, they got our Doritos! Now what are we gonna munch once we get the weed? >"Oh, fugde! Rika. I wonder if are cousins in Japan are stall >getting in trouble with red jacket kid." Rini (Fairy tale narrator): Then the Red Jacket Kid met Mr. Rufatumphskin deep in the forest... >A cat look pokemon look, a Meowth, "Great! We have problems! I >have two kids in the back." >"Get outside and out up those doors." Xelloss: ............... translation please? ^_^;; Ramza: Um... er... damn, I haven't a clue. Hanpan: I know it! It says "This job a gift from God! This's is the way!" Xelloss: ... wonderful. ~_~;; >Messila saw a blone hair Valley girl and a red-face American >Indian male with a black feather in his red hair. They were both >wearing matching white outfits Together they give her something >to dred. The Team Rocket Ramza: o/~ -got runned over by a reindeer/ Walking home from our house Christmas Eve... o/~ Xelloss: .............. ooooookay... ^_^;; >"Prepare for trouble! Make It Double! To protect the world of >devastation....To united all people within our nation... Rini: United we stand, divided we make a big mess. ^_^ Xelloss: I'm beginning to like her... ^_^ Ramza: *grumble* Well, don't expect _me_ to clean it up. >To denouce the evils of truth and love..To extend our reach to the >stars above..." Xelloss: My kinda people! ^_^ >"Roland" said the American Indian male said >"Rika!" said the Valley Girl. Lucca: That monster thing from SaGa Frontier is in Team Rocket? Xelloss: ... I retract my former statement. ~_~;; >Team Rocket Blast Off at the Speed of Light! Surrender now or >prepare to fight!" Jack: -with giant wedges of CHEESE! Hanpan: You sure you're OK, Jack? Jack: Yeah, why? >"Mewoth! That's right!" a Meowth said. "We are the Team Rocket >members at the stolen this truck! We not allowing you take this >truck with out a fight?" Xelloss: *Thinks* Don't let the nonsense get to you; you have a reputation to maintain... >_< >"SHOOTS! THATS STINK! BUT OK!" shouted Messila. "So what rules?" Rudy: (Messila): We don't need no rules! Anarchy forever! Xelloss: Ooo, say that again. ^_^-<3 Rudy: *Flatly* _No_. >"No rules, Pokemon. Roland, since you hate Joys, take out Iris's >Pokemon." Rika said "I force this girl into joining us." Lucca: Adel _is_ Rika _in_ "Messila's Journey"! Rudy: Rinoa-chan, RUN! >"Go! Ekans!" said Rika. >"Go! Koffing!" said Roland. Ramza: Thunderbirds are GO! Rini: GO! Dot Com! Rudy: GO! Away! >"Go! Charamander!" said Messila. >"Go! Bulbsuar!" said Iris. Lucca: GO! Directly to jail! Xelloss: Do not pass GO! ^_^ Jack: Do not collect $200! *All stare at Jack* Hanpan: You missed the point completely, _as usual_, Jack. >Ekans start the four way battle the guys. He tackle Charamander >and Charamnder's attack at Bulbsuar. Koffing miss Bulbsaur with >his sludge attack! Charamander start his rage with his attack and >keep punch until both Koffing and Ekans were down. Xelloss: *Trying to make sense of that paragraph* Guh... Incoherency... with my lack of Pokemon knowledge... overwhelming... head hurting... Talking... like... Shatner... Talking like... *His head explodes. He falls down* X_X Rudy: Wuss. Just part one of "FFVII: TUS" would take him out. Xelloss: *Out of it, moans* it would not... X_X >"Ekans! Return!" Rika groans >"Koffing! Return!" Roland groans. >"TEAM ROCKET IS BLAST OFF!" stated Roland, as he voice. Ramza: -his opinions about Tinky-Winky? >"Charmander! Ember those chip!" Rudy (Citan): NOOOOOOOOO! NOT MY DORITOS! Ramza (Sigurd): Oh well, we'll just have to find... "something" else to do after we light up... ^_^-<3 Rini: Ramza no baka! *Thwap!* Ramza: Ow... I was just joking! ^^;; >Charmander blast his fireball into the pile and melt them into a >pile of burned chips. >"Charamander, return!" Messila said trumiph. "Are first REAL Team >Rocket battle! Thanks, Iris." Hanpan: Oh, it's "On behalf of Expel, I will slay you!" ^^ Jack: You're acting goofy today, Hanpan. Hanpan: Yeah. I guess you guys are growing on me... like fungus. *Xelloss is almost fully recovered* >"You weclome." Iris said. "Look!" >A man with a long red hair. "Joyce Sawer. Pokemon Truck Driver. I >was look for many truck. Looks like his going to River's Town >Recylce Center. Do you like a ride." Xelloss: It depends. Who with? ^_^-<3 >"Sure!" Iris and Messila shouted girl. Rini and Lucca (Messila and Iris): GIRL! >It took a while, but Iris and Messila find River Town as not as >few as thought. >"What happen to you, Joyce?" ask the Officer at the Gate. >"Rocket Trouble, Officer Jenny" stated Joyce. Rudy: That sounds like the name of a bad lemon fic. Xelloss: ... thank you _so_ much for that image. *Whacks Rudy with his staff* ^_^;; >Messila and Iris both giggles. >THE END >--Water coming up? A splash battle in the next Gym. Don't flow >away from this fan-fiction. Rini: Oh, I gotta say it! ^^ Rudy: Don't you dare- Rini: In the rain or in the snow- *Rudy covers her mouth* MMPH! Xelloss: -got the got the funky flow! ^_^ Rudy: *Exasperated* I just can't _win_ here! >----------------------------------------------------------------- Ramza: DUCK! It's the Pika Pi attack! *All but Xelloss duck* Xelloss: Don't be silly, it's just a- *Gets nailed with the Pika Pi attack; indignantly* Now that was just juvinile. Rudy (Terrence): Now you're a smelly priest. ^_^ Xelloss: *Angered* Shut up, boy. Can I go now? Voice: Not 'til it's over, Xell-baby. ^_^ >NEW POKEMONS: Jenkar is a comman pokemon in the southwestern >states the United States of American. Jenkar looks like Coyote. >Jenkar does not speak, but he has power of thunder with him. Ramza and Rini (Sailor Jupiter): Jenkar Thunder... CRASH! ^_^ >He's worth almost 10 Millions Dollars in the eastern states. Jack: Dude! Hey, Hanpan, how much is that in gella? Hanpan: A lot, Jack, I know that much... >Jenkar evolves into Jenkira at LV 31, and it becomes Jenkihar, >at level 40. >----------------------------------------------------------------- Xelloss: Good, it's over. _Now_ can I go? Voice: You promise to not come back? Xelloss: Sore wa, himitsu desu. *Gets hit again with the Pika Pi attack* OK, OK... *grumble* ... I _promise_. Voice: Good boy. Buh bye! *Xelloss vanishes* Rudy: Heh, heh, heh... Let's get outta here, guys. ^_^ *All exit* *Reverse door sequence* [SOL] Rudy: *Star Ocean bouncing note balloon* o/~ He's gone! He's gone!/ Never to be seen again!/ C'mon, celebrate, my friend! o/~ *The red button flashes* And it's Justin, Feena, and Sue calling! ^^-o/~ [E.C.] Xelloss: Never to be seen again? Hardly, my lovely. ^_^ *Rudy facefaults on the other side of the screen* Mala-chan: Meet my newest assistant, lab rats! Isn't he _adorable_? [SOL] Rudy: Yeah, adorable like a _Chu-Chu_. Rini: Dude, that is _not_ cool! No one's _that_ bad! ^^;; Lucca: But he's definitely a step up from _Dycedarg_... ^^ Rini: Yeah, but so's Chu-Chu. Rudy: Hypocrite. Rini: Bite me. [E.C.] Xelloss: That an open invitation? ^_^-<3 *WHAM!* Mala-chan: Remember what I said? Xelloss: "Keep the innuendo to a minimum or [I'm] out on my can"? ^_^;; Mala-chan: So you _did_ hear me. Good. Now push the button, Xelloss. *FWOOOSH!* *Fade to black* *Roll credits* --------------------------------------------------- THE REAL END E-mail comments to me at: Lessa990@aol.com Or your life is forfeit! >"Mewoth! That's right!" a Meowth said. "We are the Team Rocket >members at the stolen this truck! We not allowing you take this >truck with out a fight?" Lookie, a shameless plug! Organized Chaos! http://www.crosswinds.net/~rinichan My own site. Beware the Temporary Portal, er, Picture of the Week; It can lead you to strange things... Season one: ------------------ Episode 101: "Battle of the Strongest" Episode 102: Raging Double Feature ("Wild ARMs Rage" and "Toshinden Rage") Episode 103: "The Cursed Waters" Episode 104: "The Jonathanlizers" Episode 105: "Final Fantasy VII: The Untold Story" part 1 Episode 106: "The Return of Lord Thinker" Episode 107: "Get Rich Quick" spam. Episode 108: "Don't Freak Out" Episode 109a: "The Price of Redemption" parts 1-3 Xenogears interludes: ------------------------- Episode 109b: "The Price of Redemption" parts 4-5 Episode 201a: "Messila's Journey" part 1 Episode 203: "Ash's New Friend" Episode 206: "Emerald Nights" part 1 Episode 207: "Pokemon Gangbang" (MSTed with Hyperonius) Season Two: ---------------- Episode 202: "Why RPGs Should be Severely Censored and Devoid of Character Development" Episode 201b: "Messila's Journey" part 2 Episode 201c: "Mesilla's Journey" part 3 Episode 204: "FFVII: The Untold Story" part 2 Episode 205: "Behind the Scenes" Episode 208: "Beloved? Yeah, Right" Season Three: ------------------ Episode 301d: "Messila's Journey" part 4 Episode 301e: "Messila's Journey" part 5 Other MSTings: ------------------ Episode 000: "Rebirth" (MSTed with Nick) Episode 001: Stephen Gohan's letter to the GIA (MSTed with Katana Angel) *Coming soon!* Episode 002: "Cloud Vs. Aeris" (MSTed with Nick)