Legal Crap Mystery Science Theater 3000 & the related characters are owned and copyrighted by Best Brains Inc. Final Fantasy Tactics, Xenogears, and Chrono Trigger are copyrighted by SquareSoft Wild ARMs is copyrighted by Media Vision or Contrail, the latter being the newer name for the company. Any other thing I forgot to mention is copyrighted to it's owner(s). Please don't sue; I have no money as is. ~.~;; "Messila's Journey" is owned by the ever enimgmatic Dr. Thinker. and is welcome to it. The intent of this MSTing is not to insult/offend Dr. Thinker, but to simply make a humorous commentary the story. Please don't hurt or flame me. <=8 Chibi-chan's notes (a.k.a. Other Stuff) MSTing number... um... er... I forget. Heheh, heheh! ^^;; With that out of the way, Here we gooooooooooooo!! ------------------------------------ *Last time on IFTW...* [Evil Central] Krelian: What are we going to do to them for making us read that so-called "editorial"? Mala-chan: Heh, I know. Dycedarg, we got the next two chapters of "Messila's Journey"? Dycedarg: Yes, we do. Mala-chan: *Cheerfully* Then send 'em up! Dycedarg: Gladly. *Presses a button* [SOL] *Rini, Rudy, and Ramza are still on the bridge* Rini: WE HAVE FANFIC SIGN! ---------------------------- (Singer) In the not too distant future, (Methinks it was next Thursday) A bunch of poor suckers Have some hell to pay! A group of evil people, led by Mala-chan, They were bored one day, so they dreamed up a plan. They choose some people they didn't like, Then they sent those poor victims into space and- *B-ko cackles* (Mala-chan) We'll send them crappy fanfics, As many as we can find! (Lalala!) (Marle) They'll have to sit and read them all! (Dycedarg) And they'll slowly lose their minds! (Lalala!) (Singer) Now keep in mind they can't control Where the fanfics begin or end. (Lalala!) To try to keep their sanity, Upon each other they must depend! RIFFER ROLL CALL! Rudy! (No Parappa!) Rini! (Rudy no baka!) Ramza! (Why me?) Lucca! (I'm a genius!) Jaaaaaaaaaack! (Oh bugger...) If you're wondering how they eat and breathe And other science fact, Just think to yourself, "It's just a file, I should really just relax, For 'Idiotic Fanfic Theater Whatever' *Twang!* *Door sequence: Door 6: Dogbone door. Opens automatically. Door 5: Joe Chin drives you to the next door (Rudy: Why do _we_ have to sit in the back with the exhaust pipes?! Ramza: Smile and nod, just- *WHAP!*). Door 4: It's a pile of Beanie Babies. Joe drives you though the pile with no concern of their value. Door 3: It's your normal run-of-the-mill drawbridge. It falls out towards you, barely missing you. Door 2: It's Kenny! Joe Chin drives over him too. Door 1: It's a wall. Tinkerbelle comes, waves her wand, and an opening appears. Joe Chin lets you out of the car and you go through. Seating (L-R): Ramza, Rini, Rudy, Lucca, Jack* >See Part 1 for Notes.ADDITIONAL NOTE 1: [INFORMATION FROM A POKEDEX] ----------------------------------------------------------------- Rini: Look! A safety rail! Lucca: Now if only Kevin Nash would fall over it... >Messila's Journey >A Pokemon Story >Part 2 - Private Routes. Rudy: "Private Routes"? That sounds like the name of a bad lemon fic. >by Dr. Thinker Lucca: I didn't know ol' Doc Thinker wrote that kind of fic- *Shish-THOOM!* Dr. Thinker's voice: I do not! >----------------------------------------------------------------- >Messila was her blue Pokedex. Rini: Yes, you must become one with the Pokedex. You _are_ the Pokedex! >[Rattata: A small blue Jack (Steve): But Blue's not a rat, she's a dog! *WHAP!* Rudy: Shut up, Jack. >rat-like Pokemon that lives in a forrester, Ramza (Dr. Forrester): Frank! Get this thing outta me! Rini (Pearl Forrester): Why are these rats tormenting us?! All we did was torment Mike and Joel! >to eat nuts and berries. Rudy: They may be nuts, but where would they find berries in the Forrester family? >Sometimes comes out in middle of open field to steal food from >passing travel.] Lucca: "Passing travel"? They rob buses? >Messila tosses out her Pokemon, and outs pops Rini: -Sailor Mercury? Rudy: *Takes out Hand Cannon ARM* Senshi?! Get 'em away from me, away, I say! Jack: Thank you, Dr. Seuss. >Charamander, Rudy: Whew! *Puts back ARM* >a red- lizard-like Pokemon."Charamander, Ember attack!" Rini: Shavon Spray! Rudy: No Sailor Moon! Salior Moon bad! Jack: Get a hold of yourself, kid! There are no Salior Senshi up here! Honest! Rudy: Sailor Moon is still bad! >Charamander open his mouth, Rini ("Charamander"): *Singing* o/~ IIIIIIIII love a paraaaaaaade! o/~ >but before he can attack. Jack: -Citan Uzuki jumped out of the bushes with a chainsaw! Oh, the humanity! Citan's voice: *Doubtfully* Now where would I find a chainsaw at this hour? >Ratta attack with a tackle! Rudy: First Down! >Charamander fires his Ember attack, a fireball Rini(Chun Li as Charamander): Kikoshou! >that knock Rattata into a near-by tree. "Go! Ramza: Do I collect 200 gil now? >Pokeball!" Lucca: Only _one_? How sad- *THWAP!* Rini: Ecchi! >shouted Messila. The ball soar thought air, Rini: o/~ Riiiiiiiide/ Higher and higher and soar above the clouds... o/~ >open right Jack: -next to a Starbucks and was closed due to lack of income. >above Rattata. A red light comes out and takes Rattata in. Lucca: *Spookily* HeAd TowARd THe LigHT... >Then, she waited. Ramza: -for the bus to come. Sadly, the bus ran over her, the end. >The ball shake for a bit, All: EARTHQUAAAAAAAAAAKE!! *A Pokeball rolls out from under the seats. Rudy sees it and picks it up* >but Pokeball stops shaking. >"Looks like you did good!" say a voice. *All look at the P.A. speaker* Voice: What? >"If you are member of Team Rocket, get lost!" shouted Messila. Lucca: Or if you're Ryouga, you can get lost too. >"No. I'm live around here. I'm Beetle, Private Beetle!" Rini: *Waves a katana around menacingly* Not one word outta any of ya! >said a young man with a squash hat, and what-looks t-shirt & >pants "Did you get your name from a comic strip?" asked >Messila. "Yes, but unlike my namesake, I'm not lazy >good-for-nothing? Ramza: Why is he asking her if he's lazy? Shouldn't he know is he is or not already? >Are you up-to-par to fight bug Pokemons? Go! Beedrill! Rudy: *Throws the Pokeball* Pokeball, go! *When it hits the floor, a Raichu comes out of the ball* Raichu: Raichuuu! Rini: Exactly how long have you had one of those? *Points to Raichu* Rudy: Not long; its Pokeball just rolled out in the open a little while ago. >A orange bee-like animal appear, with four drills on each >oftheir legs. [Beedrill: In the wild, Beedrill uses their >drills to make honey. Rudy: Cutie Honey? Rini: *Purposely off key* o/~ A taste of honeeeeeeeeey/ Tasting much sweeter than wiiiiiiiiiine... o/~ >In Pokemon trainer, Beedrill uses it's drills to stop a enemy >pokemon. Beware, some of it's attack are Posion type.] All: Oy vey... Rudy: Poison status sucks. Jack: Yeah. >"Go! Charamander!" Charamander starts off, blasting it was a >fire attack! TheBeedrill is stand. Rini: TheBeedrill: ph33r m3 d00d! Jack: How did you pronounce that? Rini: I wish I knew. >"Ouch! Beedrill, return!" shriek Beelte. Ramza: Beetle got hit too? Lucca: No, Beelte did. >"Try this! Butterfree!" Rudy: Sorry, I may be desperate, but I'm not _that_ desperate. Rini: Rudy! *Whacks him with the Bokken of Deep Hurting (TM)* >A blue butterfly Pokemon appear. [Butterfee: A more comman bug >Pokemon. Most trainers think just a beatiful butterfly. Jack: o/~ Beautiful Butterfree/ Wake onto me... o/~ *WHACK!* Rudy: Don't start singing, you! >It has powerful posion and stun attack. Sobeware of them.] >Charamander attacks with another Ember attack at the bug. Rini (Ryu as Charamander): Shinkuu Hadoken! >Itfails downs. Jack: Looks like it's not a weeble Pokemon. Weebles wobble but they don't fall down... >"Finish it, Charamander!" command Messila. Lucca (Mortal Kombat Announcer): FINISH HIM! >"Great fight!" Rini: 37-Hit Combo! FEAR GAMBIT, MORTALS! Rudy: You've been playing far too much of that X-men Vs. Street Fighter. Rini: So? The Arcade version rocks! >a voice said. "Who in heck are you?" asked Private Beetle. Rini (Buttercup): I AM THE _QUEEN_!! >"To protect the world of devastation...." Rudy: Oh Megami-sama, not them! >"To united all people within our nation..." "To denouce the >evils of truth and love.." Rudy: Oh bugger, it is! Rini: No worries, Team Rocket will be blasting off in no time! >"To extend our reach to the stars above...""John!" "Blast Off >At the Speed of Light!""Surrender of prepare top fight?" Rini: I don't think that's the right end line... >A young man about 18 appears. Unlike Gary or Mary Lungs, this >members Rini: *Waves the katana around again* No. Lucca: Aw... >has a pocket. In the pocket is, Marpik. [Marpik: This is the >most weakest of all Pokemon in the now universe. Long time, >ago. It was the most powerful in the word?" Ramza: And that is how a dictionary can be a long-range weapon, everyone. Rini: I still don't get it... >"Wonder why I have a Magikarp? Here. It's Lucca: -a poorly structured sentence? >just here for getting Exp before he becoems a Gyarados! Rudy: Allow me to be the first to say, "Whoop-de-frikkin'-do." >Until then, he's your first.Go! Eevee! Rudy: Go, Raichu! *Points at Rini. Raichu then Thunder Shocks Rini* Rini: Ow... >[Eeve: The Evolution Pokemon. He can evole in three ways with >three different stores.] Rini: Which ones? Dominick's, Jewel, and Strack and Van Till's? Ramza: Strack and... wha? >"I'm go easy on you, if you consider beening Jack: *Takes out a baseball* Bean who where? >my parenter in Team Rocket. The way that use hand my >rivails, Gary and Mary Lungs. You will be a great members." Rini: Handing rivals? Flashing back... Ranma and Ryouga lemon... ARGH! Rudy: Um, Ranma was in girl form, right? Rini: *Computer-like* Repressing memory; please wait until compression is complete. Ramza: Rini? Are you all right? Rini: *Computer-like* Program error OE; press any key to continue. Ramza: This is not good... >stated John "I'm consider it. No!" Messila commanded. Ramza: Commanded what? The French Army? Rudy: *French accent* Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries! >"Then, you ask for it. Rini: *Somewhat mechanically* o/~ Hold the pickle, hold the lettice/ Special orders don't upset us/ all we ask is that you let us/ Have it your way... o/~ >Eeve give him a tackle attack!" Johncommand Ramza: He really should've used Reflect until Charmander used a special skill and then Mimic the skill... *All stare at him* What? >"Charamander! Slash it!" Rudy: Slash them tires good! >command Eeve runs to Charamander, but misses. Lucca: Oh, there's a reversal! Eevee rolls up Charmander and ONE! TWO! THREE! Eevee wins the World Television Championship! >Charamander turns and slashes the Eeve. Eeve faint. Lucca: Get that poor thing a Phoenix, STAT! >"I'm was going to get a water Pokemon. Eeve, return!" Rini: *Computer-like* My mind is going... going... If you want to be a Returner, call Locke aaa.... *Slumps over* Ramza: Rini?! >"I was wonder when I was going to get battle. Rudy: I've never heard it called that before... Ramza: *Shaking Rini* Rini! Snap out of it! Rini! Rini: ......... >Most of the travels down his road, Jack: It's _my_ road, you hear? _MINE!_ Rudy: *Turns to Ramza* Is she OK? Ramza: What the hell do you think, genius?! Of course she's not all right! Rini: ... oog... *Sits up* Wha... what happened? The last thing I remember was something about parents and Team Rocket... *Leans forward slightly and puts har hand to her forehead* Ramza: You just had some sort of flashback and started to act strange; are you all right now? Rini: I think so... >or mostly Pokemon. My real name is Iris, Rudy: -Gainsborough? Lucca: Urge to kill... rising... Rudy: I take it you're not an Aerith fan. >an actoress. Rini (Iris): But I really want to be... A LUMBERJACK! >I'm live in the town of Pearl Bay." Rini: Pearls are fine, but I like sapphires better. They don't disintergrate. >said Iris, taking off his black wig, Rudy: -revealing the owner of the waterpark! Jack (Scooby-Doo villian): And I could've gotten away with it if it weren't for those dratted kids and their Charmander! >reviding a mess of long pink hair. "My lastname >is Joy." Rini: o/~ Joy to the world/ The Lord has come! o/~ Rudy: Wha...? Rini: Never mind... >"As in Nurse Joy's family?" asked Messila"You get it!" >laughed Iris. >----------------------------------------------------------------- Ramza: The fic's playing lawn darts now! Rini: "Lawn darts"? >END OF PART 2 >----------------------------------------------------------------- Rudy: Delivery! Sign here, please! >So Messila meets Iris. What going happen? Rini: *sigh* Go for it this time. Rudy: ......... Great, the one time I'm _allowed_ to make one of those comments, I can't think of anything! >Find out next in Part3. >---------------------------------------------------------------- Jack: *Ducks* Hey, watch that ladder next time, pal! Rini: It's over; let's go. *Reverse door sequence* [SOL] *Jack stands in front of the counter. He is trying his best to look serious* Jack: Even though the last time we tried a sketch went awry, we will now attempt to summarize this chapter of "Messila's Journey"... *Steps off-screen. Rini steps out dressed like Messila* Rini: o/~ La dee dah, o/~ I wonder if there are any Pokemon around? *Raichu steps out wearing a small set of Mickey Mouse ears* A Rattata? You're mine! *Pretends to hit Raichu with her mallet, steps back, and throws a Pokeball at it* Yata! I got it! *Rudy walks out in normal clothes. He is, however, wearing a safari helmet* Rudy: Hi. Jack: *Off screen; loud whisper* Rudy! Where's your costume?! Rudy: Charlotte set it on fire; something about death and destruction and such. Jack: Oh bugger. Well, just keep going! Rudy: *Overacting* I will defeat your puny Pokemon with my _MIGHTY BUG POKEMON OF DOOM_! MW'HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! Jack: *Off-screen* Stick to the script! Rudy: *Hasn't heard a work Jack said* And soon, _soon_, I will RULE THE WORLD!! *WHAM!* Rini: He said "stick to the script", baka! Jack: *Off-screen* That goes for you too! Lucca: *Walks on-screen* Is it time for me to come out now? Jack: NO! Oh, forget it! *Walks on screen* Can't you do _one_ little sketch without- *The red button flashes* Lucca: Not now, Oliver and company are calling. *Presses the button* [E.C.] Mala-chan: Enjoy your fic? If not, TOO BAD! You're getting the next part right now! Dycedarg, send it up! Dycedarg: Yes ma'am! This'll teach 'em to send us bad editorials! *Presses the "Send" button* [SOL] Rini: Editorials?! Lucca? *The lights flash and klaxons go off* Lucca: I'll explain later, but now WE HAVE THINKER SIGN!! ----------------------------------------------------------- To be continued... E-mail comments to me at: Lessa990@aol.com Or get a Philia Bomb where... never mind. Season one: ------------------ Episode 101: "Battle of the Strongest" Episode 102: Raging Double Feature ("Wild ARMs Rage" and "Toshinden Rage") Episode 103: "The Cursed Waters" Episode 104: "The Jonathanlizers" Episode 105: "Final Fantasy VII: The Untold Story" Episode 106: "The Return of Lord Thinker" Episode 107: "Get Rich Quick" spam. Episode 108: "Don't Freak Out" Episode 109a: "The Price of Redemption" parts 1-3 Xenogears interludes: ------------------------- Episode 109b: "The Price of Redemption" parts 4-5 Episode 201a: "Messila's Journey" part 1 Season Two: ---------------- Episode 202: "Why RPGs Should be Severely Censored and Devoid of Character Development" Episode 201b: "Messila's Journey" part 2 Other MSTings: ------------------ Episode 000: "Rebirth" (MSTed with Nick) Episode 001: Stephen Gohan's letter to the GIA (MSTed with Katana Angel)