Legal Crap Mystery Science Theater 3000 & the related characters are owned and copyrighted by Best Brains Inc. Xenogearsis copyrighted by SquareSoft Wild ARMs is copyrighted by Media Vision or Contrail, the latter being Any other thing I forgot to mention is copyrighted to it's owner(s). Please don't sue; I have no money as is. ~.~;; "Emerald Nights" is owned by the ever evil-and-proud-of-it Alexander Adkins. No offense or malice is intended in the MSTing of his story. No Chu-Chus were harmed in the making of this MSTing. Well, except for this one. *Punts a Chu-Chu* The man-eating grass of Donoloo is the running gag of one Hyperionius. (Jasper: THE GRASS! AUGH!) Chibi-chan's notes (a.k.a. Other Stuff) Oy vey, did this one take a while to finish. Sorry in advance for overdoing the hentai riffs a bit. ^^;; (Zelgadiss: There you are! The time for my revenge is _NOW_, you sick, warped little woman! I'll teach _you_ to draw me in a wedding dress with Xelloss!) ... help me... ^^;;; *Runs like a scared rabbit away from Zel* (Kumiko: Zelgadis?! Xellos?! WEDDING DRESS?!? Go get her, Zel!) With that out of the way, Here we gooooooooooooo!! ------------------------------------ [Citan's House; 30 minutes after "Ash's New Friend"] Citan Uzuki had vanished a half hour ago. Yet, no one seemed to be worried. You see, for anyone else, this would be odd, but for some reason the good doctor disappeared and reappeared on multiple occasions. The strangest part was that he was always a little rattled upon reappearance, as if someone had done something to him. No one knew for sure, but Fei had this theory that some other evil persons in the Multiverse made him read additional bad fanfiction. Of course, everyone else dismissed this theory. "But it could be true!" Fei exclaimed, half whining. "How do you know it's not possible?!" "Fei, for the thousandth time, travel to other dimensions is impossible for us!" Billy replied. "Says who, dear boy?" With that, the missing doctor reappeared in a puff of pink smoke. "*cough*hack* Stupid bloody pink smoke, what do they think I am, a bloody fairy godmother?!" Nobody paid much attention to this now-familiar lament from Citan upon arriving from wherever he was taken to. "Okie-dokie, I have some _more_ fanfic funzies for you to read, my dear little reviewers!" A collective groan filled the room. "It's called 'Emerald Nights'. Enjoy!" ----------------------------------------------- Bart: "Emerald Nights"? This ought to be _fun_. Billy: I got a bad feeling about this... >“Emerald Nights” Citan: If this is anything like "Boogie Nights", I am leaving. >Part 1 >A Xenogears Story. All but Fei: Uh oh... Fei: What? What? Billy: We should really tell him about that... *Emeralda walks in through the front door* Emeralda: Fei's Kim? Elly sent me to... whatcha doin'? Fei: A disembodied voice- Voice: Hi, Emeralda! ^^ Fei: -makes us read bad fanfiction. Emeralda: *Standing behind Fei* Oh. Can I stay? ^^ Voice: Ya sure can! Just make comments and have fun! ^^ Billy: _Fun_, she says. Feh. >By Alexander Adkins. > > >Author’s preface: this is my first Xenogears story so don’t flame >me too much. Billy: Don't worry, I won't... *evil grin* Bart: That includes sending viruses, Billy. Billy: It does? Damn. >Hopefully there will be more to come. Bart: IfyaknowwhatImean! *BONK!* Fei: That was uncalled for, Bart! >This story will try to center on Emeralda and her life Maria: Another one? How many of those are out there already?! And why doesn't anyone write about _me_?! Emeralda: Because I'm the cute one? Chu-Chu: Someone call for cute? Billy: Who let _Chu-Chu_ in here? >[and her take on events around her] a two years after the >Destruction of Deus Billy: Anyone else think that sounds like a name for a punk band? Bart: ... I'm not saying a word. >and ramifications there after. Bart (Butthead): Huhuh, he said "ramifacations", huhuh! *CLONG!* Ow! >This story is entirely from how I believe how life would go on Emeralda: o/~ And life will go on and oooooooooooooon! o/~ Maria: If you weren't new to this, so help me, I'd... >in the Xenogear universe. Otherwise, enjoy this tale, and please >tell me what you think about it. I do Emeralda: o/~ You can't hear it, but I dooooooooo... o/~ Maria: Kiss up. Voice: Shush! *ZAAAP!* Maria: OW! >so love to hear your view on it. The Character’s are Square’s so >please don’t sue me. >------------------------- Citan: *Mechanically* Thank you for reading "Emerald Nights". Please write the lame line joke of your choice on the line above. > There was a gentle rise in warmth and a increasing levels of >illumination around her. Fei: Your sheets are radioactive! RUN! >This normally would not bother her but lately she has been trying >to integrate some forms of what other people would say would be >quite normal to do now. Maria: It's called "waking up". >She simply rolled over and covered her head with the blanket >to block out the light. Emeralda (Gizmo): Bright light! Bright light! >This seemed to do the trick for dealing with the light, so she >returned to sleeping mode. Bart: SLEEEEEEEEEEEEEP! >A few moments later, the alarm went off. Billy (Usagi): AAAAAAAAH! I'm late for class! >This wasn’t the city defense alarm, for she knew that one all to >well from the sporadic reaper and monster attacks. Fei: This has been a test of the Emergency Get the Hell Away System. If this was a real emergency, we wouldn't even be broadcasting, we'd be running around and screaming. >It was the alarm clock she had placed next to her bed. Not to >long ago, she would have just used her internal systems to Maria: -bake cookies! >wake her at a set time. But she has recently gotten into the >habit Citan: What kind of habit? I can write prescriptions- Fei: DOC! No corrupting Emeralda! >(or as Jessie Emeralda: Jessie-sama?! WHERE?! *Looks around* Billy: "Jessie-sama"?! I'm going to be ill... Fei: Oh my... Citan: There go any ideas of keeping her from being "corrupted"- *BONK!*CLONG!* That hurt, you know. >has put it, rubbing off on her from everyone else) Bart: That... don't sound right at all. >of using an external alarm clock to get up by in the morning. >She reached out with her arm Citan: She mugged Rudy Roughnight? Billy: *Winces* Ooo, that was a _bad_ one, Citan. >from under the covers to attempt to turn the alarm clock off. >She was beginning to understand and enjoy the act that she >knows to be of sleeping. All: Huh? Bart: Dude, the narrator's turned into Apu! >Her first attempt to turn it off failed Billy: Try making it take a cold shower. Bart: Billy! Emeralda: Huh? >(all the while she has kept her head under the covers, not >seeing the target wasn’t helping her a bit), so she just >barely concentrated and transformed her hand into a large >sledgehammer and pounded the off switch. Billy: *sigh* I wish I could do that sometimes... >Emeralda had to accepted the fact that it was time to get up. >It was about two years ago, during the crisis, which Emeralda >first had to live with Kim (no it’s Fei now, she chided her >self) Emeralda: Bad alternate me! Bad! >and his friends. She was just about as robotic as a colony of >nano machines could get. Fei: The first one to sing "Mr. Roboto" gets hurt. All else: ......... >But as time and her interaction with friends and the town’s >people, she was slowly gaining true humanity. Maria: And there was much rejoicing. All: *Blandly* Yay. >A little over a year ago she finally earned enough money to >buy her own home. Bart: Uh, _how_? *BONK!* What?! It's a good question! >Right now, she was even getting use to the idea of resisting >the urge to getting up in the morning. (Sigurd believes that >she’s imitating Bart a little too much on this point) Billy: I'd say something, but _someone'd_ start with the yaoi cracks again. Maria: You'd better believe it! ^_^ >Emeralda did get up. She (literally) poured herself into her >clothes, *Billy and Bart stare in facination* Fei (Infomercial guy): And _that_ is the power of the Juice Weasel! >quickly ate a donut Citan: Homer Simpson or Emeralda, you decide. >from her kitchen to power her body for the rest of the >day, Billy: Coffee-flavored ice cream works better. ^_^ Bart: Don't remind us about that, Billy. Emeralda: Huh? Maria: You weren't there. Let's just put it this way: what happens when you give Billy caffiene is a scary thing to behold... Citan: Or a few drinks. I _told_ Jessiah it was a bad idea... Billy: *!!* Ix-nay, _ix-nay_! Maria: *Pictures Billy drunk; giggles* >and headed off for the Nisan’s newly created Head >quarters for the reconstruction of civilization. This does >not just mean the rebuilding of the cities of the Kislev, >Aveh, and strengthening the internal systems as well as >repairing damage done to Nisan. But that’s not all of it’s >reason to exist as well. Billy (Infomercial announcer): But wait, there's more! It also slices, dices, and makes julian fries! All this and more for the low, low price of 19 payments of 20 G! Get yours _NOW_! >It has a secondary mission as well. *All hum the "Mision Impossible" theme* Citan (Mr. Phelps): Your mission, if you choose to accept it, is to read bad fanfiction while keeping your sanity... >It is to complete the excavations that Aveh and Kislev where >performing and recovering (and restoring what they could) Emeralda: -Jimmy Hoffa! ^_^ >from the ruins of the old ethos H.Q. and other Technology >rich areas. Like Fort Jasper and the dig site at the ancient >Zeboim capital for example. Citan: Thank you, Mister Exposition. >Emeralda didn’t even bother to stall to soak in the beautiful >view of Nisan, Citan: That is beacuse she is not a sponge. All else: *groan* Citan: You sound like _you_ could do better! >for there is time enough for that. She has an appointment >with the new “Great Mother of Nisan”, Maria: The biggest car dealer on the continent! Billy: o/~ Bad puns, bad puns/ What'cha gonna do? o/~ Fei: Uh, we gotta believe? >her friend and Bart: -lover? *WHAM!*BONK!*CLONG!*WA-TAK!*TOGG!* *Small voice* ... help... >ally, Elly. Some how, slowly over the year and many heart >to heart talks. Citan: RIIIP! RIIIP! Billy (Elly's heart): So, you wanted to talk? Emeralda (her heart): Well, yeah. Is this really necessary, tho'? >Emeralda has even truly accepted Elly as her mother and Elly >in turn accepted Emeralda as her daughter. All: Awwww! >Right now was not the time for another mother/daughter chat. Maria (Emeralda): Mom? Do you ever get that "not-so-fresh" feeling? >A huge ground swell of has placed Elly as a living saint (and >the extreme fringe believe that she is a goddess) Emeralda (Elly): I'M THE GODDESS! I'M THE GODDESS! MW'HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Fei: That's Megami-sama! >and the absolute religious leader of the Church of Nisan. >This has taken a toll on her free time. Bart (Narrator): And her sex life. Fei: *groan* Don't remind me... Bart: Too much info, Fei! O.* >From helping to take care of the sick and the wounded, Citan: We've secretly replaced Elly with Mother Teresa; let's see if anyone notices... >to leading the religious ceremonies has not let her see the >rest of her close friends and allies lately these few days. Fei: But if it's her job, then it'd be hard to see them _any_ day, but... Citan: Just don't think about it, Fei. >But this wasn’t going to stop her from seeing Emeralda in her >chambers. Bart: That can sound real naughty if read with a dirty mind. Billy: Hmm... *Rereads the line* You're right, Bart... All else: O.o Billy: What? >“Oh! It is so good to see you again Emeralda!” Elly said with >much joy. They had a quick All: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! >hug All: Whew! >and Elly went to sit behind her large but still Spartan in its >function Emeralda: Large Spartan what? Stripper? Fei: EMERALDA! Emeralda: It was just a guess... >(except for a group picture of the Xeno cast, a few photos of >Fei and a lovely photo of Elly and Fei holding each other in >a loving embrace). Bart: Bomp chika bow wow! *TOGG!* Emeralda: Not _that_ "loving", hentai! >Emeralda took a seat on one of the two chairs in front of the >desk. “I hope that the project has been approved. Bart: Then we get our REVENGE! Voice: *whimper* Billy: Not _that_ project. Bart: Oh. Damn. >Both me and Billy want to return to the old Ethos headquarters >and find out what’s left down there.” Emeralda said with some >unusual amount of anxiety in her voice. Billy: Uh oh, it's one of _those_ fics... Tell me, why does everyone pair me with Emeralda? Maria: It's either her or Bart- Bart: MARIA! Maria: Well, it is! >Elly picked up on it immediately and rose an accusing eyebrow. Bart: The People's Accusing Eyebrow! Maria (Elly/Rock): If you smella-la-la-la... what the Elly is cooking? >“I can understand why Billy would want to go back there Citan (Elly): But we have to keep the matches and the gasoline away from him when he gets there... >and put to rests old ghosts, but why would you want to go >along with him?” Emeralda: *Cheerfully* Then I might get a chance to see Jessie-sama! ^__^-<3 Billy: *Looks up at the source to the disembodied voice* You're sick, you know that? Voice: Oh, come on, kiddo! She's got a few thousand years on him, remember? >Emeralda went stiff and felt warmth fill her face. Citan (Kim/Fei): Maybe that nuclear reactor in her _was_ a bad idea... Fei: Doc... >She guessed she was blushing. She knew of and understood the >concept of being embarrassed, but this was the first time she >could ever remember FEELING the emotion of embarrassment. It >was a strange new sensation to her. Bart (Edwina as Emeralda): Tingles... Billy: *sigh* That's pretty obscure, Bart. >Elly gave Emeralda a sly look. “Don’t tell me that the gossip >is true now?” Emeralda (Elly): The rumors that you've been boffing the priest boy? Fei: EMERALDA! Maria (Emeralda): What?! I thought that it was Bart that was boinking him! Bart and Billy: MARIA! >Emeralda bushed even more, Voice: His L key doesn't work right either? It's a conspiracy! >she thought that even her hair was turning a deeper shade of >green. She quickly shook her head in defense of her self. >“No,no,no,no! Citan: *Horribly off-key* o/~ Bismilah, NOOOO!/ We will not let him go! o/~ Fei: And Freddy Mercury rolls over in his grave now... >Billy is just a good friend of mine! Bart (Emeralda): A _very good_ friend, IFyaknowwhatImean! Emeralda (Elly; British): Oh, nudge nudge, wink wink, saynomore, saynomore... Fei: BART! EMERALDA! >Nothing more!” This wasn’t working, and she knew it when Elly >just gave her a grin and said in a harmlessly teasing way, “My, >oh my, it seems my daughter has got herself a boyfriend!” Bart (Elly): But why Jessiah Black?! Emeralda: Because he's so cool! ^__^-<3 Billy: I think I'm gonna be sick. >.< Fei: I might join you, Billy... O.o >Emeralda looked away and said with some difficulty, “Mother, >PLEASE! Citan (Emeralda): I'll stop using wire hangers, I swear! >I, I don’t know what to think now. This is all so strange to >me.” Maria: *Opens her mouth to say something* Billy: If it involves a "not-so-fresh" feeling again, please don't say it. *Maria closes her mouth* >Elly stood up, she opened a drawer in her desk and took >out a *Fei quickly covers Bart's mouth* Fei: _NO_, Bart. >file and walked over to Emeralda with it in her hands. Maria: -instead of it hovering behind her. >As she drew closer to Emeralda, she stood up and Elly opened >the file so that both of them could read it easily. Emeralda (As herself): Uh... what's a Karma Sutra? Fei: EMERALDA! What has gotten into you lately?! Bart (Emeralda): Jessie-sama- *WHAM!*WHAM!*WHAM!* ow... Billy: *Discards broken pool cue* Bart, shut it. >“Take it easy little one, I do not mean anything accusing >from it. Maria: Elly or Yoda, you decide. Citan (Elly as Yoda): Fight you will, Mega Man! For peace everlasting, you will! >But what ever choice you make in life, I will do all I can to >help you.” Bart (Elly/Pinky): *Recovering* But where can we find a duck and a hose at this hour? *BIFF!*BAM!*POW!* ... medic... Fei: We did _NOT_ need that mental image, Bart! Bart: But that's not what I meant, I swear! >Elly gave her a caring smile and in return Emeralda tried >to give a smile of happiness as well. Elly continued and >pointed to some documents and pictures in the file. Billy (Emeralda): Wow, there realy _are_ naked pictures of Bea Arthur out there! *All else gag* Bart: Dude, SICK! >“Also, I did approve and have the manpower and resources >diverted to your project. Citan (Elly): Just don't forget the 8mm movie cameras and watch out for the witch... >I do believe that there is some technology that would definitely >help all of civilization Billy: Like spackle and Prozac and the Five Intel Cids! ^_^ Fei: You been hitting the bong with doc, Billy? >to rebuild from the destruction that has happened during Dues’s >resurrection.” Maria: A major diaster was caused by someone charging for overdue library books? >Emeralda looked it over and smiled. “This will be fine.” She said. Bart (Emeralda): So will Jessie-sama once I get him in that thong- *WHAM!*WHAM!*WHAM!*WHAM!* ... I deserved that... *Falls over, unconscious* Billy: *Tosses aside another broken pool cue* Damn straight you did. Emeralda: Hmm... ^_^-<3 >After spending a half-hour talking about technical details of >the project and some personal things that has happened lately. Maria: Like that "not-so-fre-" *Billy glares at her* Um, never you mind... Citan: My, you have a shorter-than-usual temper today, Billy. *Billy mutters something that sounds an awful lot like "Bite me."* >Emeralda knew it was time to go. Citan: In the rain or in the snow, I got the funky flow, but now, I really got to go~! ^_^ Fei: And now the Parappa refs start... >“It is about time for me to go and you have many others that >need to see you today Elly.” “Yes, yes, I know, I know all to >well” Elly said with a tired expression. Fei: Now SLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP! >“I do hope that you can make the victory anniversary >celebration party next weekend.” Billy (Mina): 'Cause Sailor V means VICTORY! >Emeralda mentioned with an unusual grin. “I heard that Bart >will be the MC Maria (Bart): Yo, yo, yo, this is MC Fatima all up in your area! *Bart starts to come to* >[Elly rolled her eyes Bart (Craps table runner): Snakes eyes! You lose! >and smiled when she heard that] and that Fei is also planing >some surprise announcement or event at the party. Billy (Fei): I like shorts! They're comfy and easy to wear! Bart (Fei): I'm really hungry! Maria (Fei): I once ate a cricket! Citan (Fei): I'm going to have a sex-change operation! Fei: DOC! >[Elly arced and eyebrow at this] Even I don’t know what it >is.” Citan: It - pron. - Refers to something that has no gender, i.e. a rock, a toolbox, etc. Sentence: '_It_ is a large pototo.' Billy: Thank you, Mr. Webster. >“Yes,” said Elly. “I admit that Fei and I have gotten even >closer these last several months, but I don’t know if Fei >wants to, to.” Emeralda: Toto? They want to star in "The Wizard of Oz"? >She sighed, turned and looked out a window. Citan: Then a woman came in threw it... wait, that would be the _bathroom_ window... >Emeralda placed her and on Elly’s shoulder. She didn’t have a >lot of ability empathize with people, but she tried anyway. Fei (Emeralda): Is _this_ your card? Emeralda (Elly): For the 50th time, no, it isn't. >“He doesn’t seem to want to commit to settling down with me >now that Dues is gone. Maria (Elly): Now we can take out library books without fear of late fees! All: Huzzah! >He’s been so busy with helping repair the cities and dealing >with the loose monsters and Wels. But he’s been gone hunting >for bounties this whole week with Jessie, Dan, and Yosho.” Emeralda: Jessie-sama?! Where?! Billy: Ugh, quit calling him that... >.< Fei: *sigh* ............ >Emeralda looked confused for a moment when Elly mentioned Yosho, Citan: And now it is a Nintendo crossover! Fei: Yo_sho_, doc, not Yo_shi_. Citan: Oh. >until she reminded her that Yosho is Fei’s #1 fan Maria (Yosho; ominous voice): I'm your number one fan, Fei... *Pretends to hit Fei's ankles with an imaginary sledgehammer* Fei: That.... was really creepy, Maria. Maria: Eheh... >and student after he rescued him from a pack of hobgoblins a >few months ago. She quietly chided herself for not recalling >him fast enough. Billy (Emeralda): I'm a naughty girl, a naughty, naughty- *TOGG!* ow. >“I wonder why he is earning so much money now? We have all we >ever going to use for a very long time. Some times I don’t >understand him.” Citan: He does not even understand _himself_, Elly. Fei: Yeah- HEY! >Elly closes her eyes and lowers her head. Emeralda was stunned >by Elly’s confession. Bart (Elly): *Recovering* OK, so I _did_ have sexual relations with the priest boy... *Billy says nothing as he smacks Bart upside his head* Citan (Emeralda): Wow, Billy really gets around, don't he? *WHAM!* >She had a hard time to bury her jealousy of Elly due to her >attention to Fei. But now, she understands that she truly loves >him. All: .......... Citan: The first one to sing "I Will Always Love You" dies. >And now, she’s worried that he’s slipping away. Handling these >strange things Billy: *snicker*chuckle* ^^ Bart: Wha- *Realizes* BILLY! Honestly, I'dve never thought _you_ of all people... *Trails off* >called emotions were never easy for Emeralda, but she was >beginning to understand her feelings now. >“Even I don’t what Kim is, (she catches herself) what Fei is >planing or doing now, but please. Don’t worry any more Elly. >I, I have trust in him that he knows what he is doing and that >it’s the right thing as well.” Maria: o/~ Uh huh/ You got the right one, ba~bay! o/~ >That seems to have gotten though to Elly and she lightened her >expression. “Yes, I trust Fei with all my heart as well.” Billy (Elly; snide): I trust he'll raid my underwear drawer and put on a pair- Fei: BILLY! Bart: Just what the hell's gotten into you today, kid? Billy: Uh... *Thinks hard for a moment* Half a pint of coffee ice cream. Bart: Ah, that explains it. Emeralda: Why does it explain it? Bart: Caffiene does weird things to that kid, that's why. >Elly said. Emeralda checked her internal clock and it was time >for her to go and get ready for Fei: -some football! >her exploration of the old Ethos H.Q. with Billy. “I will see >you again before I leave Elly.” Emeralda said in the best way >she could with out jostling her much in her present emotional >condition. Citan: And now Elly has turned into a China doll. _Groovy_. *All look at him oddly* >They hugged one more time before she left. >Emeralda spent the next few hours shopping and organizing her >supplies for this excursion, for she was planing to spend >several days down there. Fei: Not. One. Word. You two. Billy: Who, _me_? Bart: Wouldn't dream of it, Fei. >Herself, some extra hands, and Billy, to her this wasn’t just >a recovering/ investigation project, Fei: -but the prelude to DISASTER! Oh, the humanity! >but a “nice” vacation with Billy. On that note, she decided to >pack some extra Omegasols, just in case something went wrong >to ruin it. Bart: Like the man-eating grass of Donaloo? Jasper's voice: THE GRASS?!? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! Bart: Huh? Voice: Uh, pay no attention to the link to another's crew, Fatima. Bart: Uh, OK... >That old base would most likely still have some monsters loose >in it’s halls that need to be killed before the analyzing and >inspections of the base can be started. Citan: Just remember not to turn your back on any two-headed dragons. >Well, she also packed a nice swimsuit in her suitcase (no >matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t generate clothing >for herself). Billy and Bart: *sigh* ^___^-<3 Bart: There _is_ a God, then. ^___*-<3 Billy: Yep... ^___^-<3 Fei: *mumble*mutter* perverts *mumble* >There IS a nice sandy beach not to far from the >front door of the H.Q. They just couldn’t just spend all the >time there underground she convinced herself. Bart: ... I could say something about "doing 'undercover' work", but I've been blugeoned enough already today. >She smiled, as she was busy readying her possessions and >going over the supply lists. Maybe Elly was right, she was >falling in love with Billy. Emeralda: o/~ The time between meeting/ And finally leaving/ Is sometimes called falling in love... o/~ Maria: Kiss up times two. *ZAAAAAP!* Ow! >Soon enough, the time was ready to go, the gear was stowed away >in the hull of the Yggdrasil and the crew was in their rooms. Billy: And they were- MMPH! Fei: *Covering Billy's mouth* Don't you dare...! >Everything was going smoothly, Emeralda thought as she stood on >the bridge with Billy and Sigurd at the wheel. That is until >Sigurd cleared for landing and docking for Seibzehn. Citan: And Achtzehn, Neunzehn, Zwanzig, Einundzwanzig, Zweiundzwanzig... Fei: Doc, what are you talking about? Citan: Do not ask, Fei. Just... do not ask. >If Seibzehn is coming aboard, then Maria won’t be far behind. >She felt her hope sink for having a nice peaceful jaunt out with >Billy. Bart (TV announcer): "Hope Sinks", starring that chick from the "Speed" movies, is now on home video! All else: *collective groan* >She couldn’t really say that Maria was a rival for Billy’s >affections because. Emeralda: -Stone Cold said so? Maria: Because... he's already boinking Bart? *Gets glared at by Billy and Bart* Billy: Maria, let it go. Enough is enough. Maria: But- Bart: No buts. It's getting old. Maria: Drat. >Well, even though Billy openly admits that Maria is a good friend >of his, but he never had any romantic feelings to her (besides she >was still too young, she wasn’t even close to a legal age yet). Emeralda: One word, Mr. Writer person: Lolita. Billy: *sigh* Maria, forget what I just said. I'd rather have you beat her to the punch with the yaoi cracks than have _those_ comments being said. Maria: Righty-o. >But her presence will make this whole exploration uneasy. >The trip to the base was, thankfully, uneventful. Emeralda tried >to busy herself and attempt to talk to Billy about anything >important about this mission as she could think of. Fei (Emeralda): Hey, Billy, do I look better in the string bikini or the thong? All else: FEI?!? Fei: *blush* You guys are a bad influence on me... Citan: *snicker* Whatever you say, Fei... >But the way Maria looked at him and, to a point, even followed >him around the ship. Emeralda had to think about just how did >Maria got into this state of mind. Billy: She found Citan's pot plants in the basement and- Citan: *Agahst* You _know_ about those?! Billy: I didn't before you said so! O.o >She remembered how Doctor Citen’s wife Yui Billy: "Citen"? That sounds like a kind of citrus fruit. Voice: *Wasn't paying attention, hears the word "citrus"* Wha? Citrus? Lemon? No, no, I'm not planning on sending you guys a lemon, heheh, heheh. ^^;; All: .......... O.o >attempted to explain to her what a “crush” was, after she >pointed out to her the unusual actions of Dan around Citen and >Yui’s daughter Midori. Bart: Looks like Yui's been fooling around on you with this Citen guy. Citan: Bart, shut up. >With that in mind, she combined it with what she remembered >hearing about Maria’s tragic past and lonely stay up in (what use >to be) the flying city of Shevat. Fei (Jusenkyou guide): Is too _tragic_ tale of girl who live in sky three-thousand year ago... >Again, Emeralda’s new emotions stirred with in her. Citan: M.I.X. the emotions in the bowl! Rudy's voice: *growl* Parappa... Citan: Will you just get over it? It is just a game! Rudy's voice: Bite me. >Some how she could feel sorry for Maria in how she feeling now. >She guessed that this was her first attempt at love. Emeralda: So many bad love song refs, so few lines... >Then a small amount fear and concerned passed over her as well. >This was her first attempt a love too! Was this love she felt >for Billy a crush as well? Billy: Must... resist... making... a soft drink comment... >Emeralda tried to remove that thought from her mind. She wanted a >love that when both ways. Maria: *Motherly tone* And remember to look _both_ ways before crossing love, young lady! Bart: *Chanting* Can't say it, Fei will hit me. Can't say it, Fei will hit me... >Like what Elly has with Fei, something that she could believe in. >Some thing that would ensure some peace for her young soul to >live on and thrive off of. Billy: o/~ And there will come a daaaay/ Somewhere far awaaaaay/ In your arms, I'l stay- o/~ *BONK!* Fei: NO DUB SAILOR MOON SONGS! Voice: *Continuing* o/~ My only loooove... o/~ Fei: ... I should never have said anything... >As the ship landed near the H.Q., Emeralda made her move and >approached Billy in the lower half of the gunroom. *Billy and Bart start snickering* Citan: *Shakes his head* Why do I always end up getting stuck with these kind of people? Fei: *Confused* I don't get it. >“Billy? Do you have a moment? I want to talk to you.” She said >uneasily. “Sure,” said Billy, “What is troubling you Emeralda?” Bart (Emeralda): I want to know... *Austin Powers-ish* Do Oi make you 'ornah, do Oi? >“Well, do you remember when we had our talk about if I had a >soul?” She said with uncertainty in her voice. “Yes, I do >remember it. And if you have any uncertainty about it now, I’m >still here to help you.” Billy replied. Emeralda (Billy): IFyaknowwhatImean! Fei: *sigh* We're never getting past the innuendos, are we? Billy: But it's just so _easy_ to make them with this fic! >“Well, it’s not exactly that. It’s something else about being >human that has been bugging me.” Maria (Emeralda): It's when people hover around and say, "I'm not touching you!" >She paused for a second to look directly into his eyes. Her face >changed to one of pure concern and worry, the likes of which that >she has never shown to anyone before. Billy and Bart: Must... not... say it... >“I guess that to have true emotions does also make a person human. >But there has been one emotion that has eluded me for so long.” Citan (Emeralda): And that is... the longing to PARTY DOWN! All else: *collective groan* >Billy tilted his head and gave the look of being a bit puzzled. >“It’s that emotion of love that I’m lacking. I see it in so many >other people that I see and know.” Fei: Uh... "Sore wa, himitsu desu"? >Emeralda steps up next to Billy and wraps her (deceptively) >strong arms around him. Billy (Ash): Emeralda, Wrap! >Billy was taken a bit by surprise by this but didn’t try to >break free of her embrace. “I think I can feel it building in >me when…. “ she rested her head on Billy’s shoulder. “When you >are near me.” Bart: o/~ Why do birds suddenly appear/ Ev'ry time you are near? o/~ >To put it mildly, Billy was quite shocked at Emeralda confession >to him. Surprised? Yes. Confused as to what to say? You better >believe it. Citan: I gotta BELIEVE! ^_^ Fei: *Whispers to Billy* What does he think this _is_, a Fritz Fraundorf fic? >But he wasn’t angered or repelled by what she said. In fact, he >returned her embrace. Maria: GLOMP! *Shampoo/Emeralda* Aiya! Stupid Billy, Emeralda no want date with you! Emeralda want date with Jessiah! >She leaned her head to Billy’s head. She felt a warmth pass over >her. Emeralda had that feeling again that she’s blushing. No >wonder she thought that the feeling of love is kind of awkward. Citan: It is not awkward, it just has all the grace of drunken rhino. Billy: You mean like that one in "Son of Spellsinger"? Citan: No, _not_ like the one in whatever you are talking about. >She felt so embarrassed about admitting her feelings that she >was quite surprised that she did so in the first place. She >just wasn’t thinking before hand, she just did it. Bart: She went to the potty all by herself! Billy (Emeralda): o/~ Mommy, wow!/ I'm a big kid now! o/~ >They held each other for several moments until Billy broke the >silence. Bart (Store owner): You break, you buy it, kid. Billy: I didn't do it! It was the one-armed man! >“Emeralda….” He said quietly. She turned to look at >him in the eyes. Billy: That can sound really painful if you think about it. Bart: Yeah... All else: ........... >“I do love you. Maybe not as much as you love me.” Billy said >with nervous uncertainty of saying something that you where >afraid to say. Emeralda: o/~ You must... love... me.../ You must... love... me... o/~ >“But I want to love you more. I have been alone for so long >with my studies, my job, and everything else.” Bart (Billy): I still need to catch all 151 Pokemon, too. Citan: *growl* Bulbasaur must die... Billy: Let me guess... bad trip involving a Bulbasaur? Citan: You have no idea... >He pauses to brush aside a strand of Emeralda’s green hair. >“Every time there was trouble, you where there to help me.” Fei (Billy): Like that time when I was stuck on the second level of Parappa and you finished it in one try... Billy: *grumble* Stupid Instructor Mooseilini... *Sulks* >(Flash back of Emeralda blocking attacks that was aimed at >Billy from a wels raiding party on the orphanage. Maria (Random Wel): PANTY RAID! *Pause* Aw, crap! There's only a bunch of kids here! >He was fumbling in a rush to reload his handgun and shotgun Fei: At the same time? Billy: I can actually _do_ that, oddly enough. >and she ran in front of him and formed a huge shield from her >hands and blocked the explosion from a detonating wels. Emeralda: BOOMSHAKALAKA! >Another memory of when they helped Fei invaded the final form >of the Dues system base in rescuing Elly. Billy is directing >his gear to lay down a covering fire that is keeping the >angels back while Emeralda is recharging her gear. While she >is doing that, she is totally defenseless.) Fei: But she mainly uses magic, so she didn't have do that often, but... Citan: Fei, for the last time, just don't think about it. >Billy leaned forward and kissed Emeralda, on her lips. Bart: *Sarcastic* No, really? We just assumed he had just kissed her a- MMPH! Billy: *Covering Bart's mouth* Don't start. >Her eyes widened out of surprise, but then she just rolled with >this and closed her eyes and kissed back. Emeralda: *Has mysteriously acquired two little dolls that look an awful like Billy and herself; cutesy tone as she moves the Emeralda doll* I wuv you, Biwwy. *Slightly male; moves the Billy doll* I wuv you, Emewalda. *Put the dolls together and makes kissing sounds* Billy: ... is anyone else disturbed by this? >Emeralda knew about kissing, she saw it happen all the time in >town and Elly and Fei have been doing this the most. Emeralda: *Now has Elly and Fei dolls; talks like Elly while moving the correponding doll* I wuv you, Fei- Billy: You mind _not_ doing that? It's... creepy. >Just as they wrap their arms around each other to enjoy their >kissing, both Billy and Emeralda had to let go and try to >hold onto the ship as it shuttered and quickly slowed down. Bart: -but they still fell down. TOGG! >The Yggdrasil’s speaker system turned on and Sigurd came Billy: Please don't say this is one of _those_ fics now... O.o Citan: BILLY! >on. “We are nearing the landing zone for the project’s site. >Everyone to their stations, we may have some unwanted welcoming >committee down there. Citan (Sigurd): -like Team Rocket. >Billy, Emeralda, Maria, please come to the bridge.” Fei (Sigurd): And Nya-Nee-Nae, enter the stage! Billy: Can we read the "Pretty Soldier Final Moon" comics now? Voice: *Exasperated* _No_, Billy... >“(Sigh), just when it became enjoyable…” Emeralda said. “Well, >we can’t keep Mr. Sigurd waiting now can we?” Billy said with >a look of a mix of disappointment and amusement. Fei (Gohan/Billy): o/~ I love Mr. Sigurd- o/~ *CLONG!* I didn't mean it _THAT_ way, I swear! >Just as they were heading up the spiral staircase, Emeralda >heard (with her greater than normal hearing) the faint foot >steps of some one walking out of the gun room above her. Citan: The digit one has grown feet? That reminds me of this one time- All else: NO! Citan: But- All else: NO! Citan: Oh, you are no fun... >She thought to herself that she was sure that no one was above >them during her talk to Billy. Citan: -except for the sniper... >As she got to the top of the stairs, she saw the door sliding >shut, but did she see a bit of Maria’s curly dark grayish hair >move away from the door? Billy: I never knew your hair was intangible, Maria. Maria: Intangiwhat? >Emeralda bit her lip in anxiety (another habit of hers that >she picked up from god knows where). She wondered if Maria saw >her making out with Billy? Rini's voice: Law 206a of General Narrative Causiality: If you see anyone leaving after you do something questionable, they saw it. Fei: Uh, OK... >She quickly looked over to Billy and she could tell that he >didn’t see Maria leaving. In her advanced nero-net for her mind, >she balanced the out comes of telling him about Maria’s possible >spying, or keeping it to herself. Billy (Rena): Energy Nero-net! >“Well, let’s get going. We have a job to do.” Billy said, and >he walked up to Emeralda and took her left hand in his right. Fei (Billy): Now it's _MY_ hand! MW'HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! >He turned to look at her and smiled. She turned to look at him >and she saw his face. His bright, shiny yet deep blue eyes >looked right back into her own golden red eyes. Maria: o/~ Into the eyes, we're on our way/ The path is straight, We'll never stray! o/~ Emeralda: A total of two people will get that one. >Her heart was doing flip-flops inside her chest, and she felt >like she would melt into a puddle from seeing his oh so hansom >eyes. Bart: The first one to "MMM-Bop" gets injured. Billy: Please, Bart, you think we'd stoop _that_ low for a laugh? >She even had to mentally strengthen her atomic structure just >to prevent herself from literally melting right there. Maria: Emeralda _is_ the T-1000 terminator! >Emeralda smiled back and said, “Yes. The sooner we get the area >cleared, the better.” She decided to keep quiet about Maria and >deal with her later. Citan (Emeralda): Now, where can I get a chainsaw...? >As both Billy and Emeralda were in the elevator to the bridge, >it shook very hard and the red emergency lights kicked in. Billy: WE HAVE MOVIE SIGN! >Billy gave her a concerned look. “No one is crazy enough to >fire on the Yggdrasil!” Emeralda said in a somewhat confused >state. Fei: But... nah, I'll let that shooting us _down_ in the middle of the stinkin' _OCEAN_ incident drop, _Bart_. Bart: Aheh... >Billy’s expression changed too, but he was more serious and >looked like he was ready to fight. This rallied Emeralda too. Emeralda: Like a pep rally? *Cheerleader* Two, four, six, eight, who do we depreciate? All else: ............. >By the time the elevator opened to the bridge, both of them >where feeling ready for anything. Anything but what was on >the main viewer both of them saw. Fei (Billy) Yow, I never knew Sigurd was that flexible. O.o Billy (Emeralda): Just Sigurd? Look at Cit- *WA-TAK!* Citan: _No_, Billy, do not go into that territory. Bart (Sigurd): Eheh... how'd that old tape get played there? >Sigurd was howling orders to the bridge crew over the red >alert sirens. Billy and Emeralda just about dropped their >jaws from what they saw. Citan: Thud! >There was a pack of giant Wels that pounding on the outside >hull. Billy: Pounding _what_ on the outside, we don't wanna know. Fei: *urk!* BILLY! >“This is impossible! I knew that we exterminated the last of >those giant Wels over a year ago!” Billy yelled in surprise. Maria: Darn Orkin man; he didn't do his job right. >Emeralda remember those hunts. To everybody’s surprise after >the destruction of Dues, Billy: *Stoned* Dude, that was one ragin' concert, man! Destruction of Deus _rocked_ the house, man! >the Solarien secret bases that housed these giant monstrosities >(they always kept spares) Citan: Off course! >had released them via the lack of attention and the Wels >themselves breaking free. Those where indeed, difficult >fights to destroy them. Billy: It was nothing compared to last-minute Christmas shopping, however. Trust me, I know. >“Well, it looks like you missed a few of them!” Sigurd said >adrenaline charged rush. Maria: Extreme... Rushing... ACTION! Billy: SURRRRGE! >Sigurd then turned to the helm and spun it to Citan: Left hand, yellow! Fei (Uncle Elmo): You're playing Twister without me?! >the starboard side to dodge a rushing Wel. Billy quickly >reached over and grabbed a pipe on the side of the wall >and Emeralda wrapped her arms around his waist as the ship >lurched over with a massive shudder. Bart (Yggdrasil): Naked pictures of Bea Arthur?! *shudder* >There was a young girl’s yell of surprise off to her right. >Emeralda looked and saw Maria hanging onto the railing. Citan: Splendid Rinoa impression, is it not? ^_^ Billy: *sigh* *Mutters something about lame lines* >She prayed that Maria wouldn’t confront her about Billy now, >especially now! “Looks like our meeting is postponed for now! >Maria, Billy, Emeralda! Get to your gears! Citan: *Mutter* Even though they do not _work_ anymore... *growl* >Our cannons can’t keep them away for long!” Sigurd said, as >righted the ship and barked the fire orders to the missile >command. Billy: Playing Sigurd today is Blue the dog. >The threesome ran back into the elevator and hit the button >to the Gear hanger floor. Billy, Emeralda, and Maria rode down >in silence. Maria gave Emeralda a dirty look. It was right >then and there, Emeralda knew she was busted. Bart: Ghostbusted! All else: *collective groan* >But thankfully Maria didn’t say anything about it. Maria then >walked over to Billy and hugged his arm. He was taken by >surprised Bart (Surprised): He's _mine_ now! ALL MINE! *Maria giggles insanely* >from Maria’s action and he too bewildered to say or do anything. Emeralda (Billy): Duuuh... I like rice. >He looked at Emeralda for help, but she had her attention >focused on returning Maria’s dirty look. “So that is the way >it’s going to be.” Billy: o/~ How'sitgonnabe?/ How's it gonna be~~? o/~ >Emeralda whispered very quietly. Maria took her finger and Billy and Bart: Must... not.. go there... >.< >gently pulled down her lower eyelid and stuck out her tongue at >Emeralda. That was the last straw Citan (Zelgadiss): Chibi _must_ be smited before she makes any more stupid pictures involving me! Zelgadiss's voice: I have to find her first, tho'... Voice: *Small voice* ... mommy... >for her! >Her fingers converted to claws, her teeth sharpened into fangs, >the ends of her hair converted into blades and spears, and her >eyes started to glow red in pure anger! Fei: Whoa... Bart: Dude, that's _cool_! ^_* >Billy saw her and Maria growling at each other. Billy spoke up >by saying, “Um, ladies, we DO have a job to do. Fei: *Mysteriously acquires a katana* Not. One. Word. *Waves it at Billy and Bart* >(He looks between Emeralda and Maria as best he could with out >provoking the situation) We have to kill those Giant Wels or >this whole mission will be ruined. Citan (Billy): And that would suck, now wouldn't it? >(The ladies huffed and turn their backs to each other, Emeralda >turned back to normal) Look, I don’t know what the problem is >here, but can we talk about this AFTER the landing zone is >clear?” Billy (Yakko): No, it's opague. *Snaps* Now it's clear. *rimshot* >The elevator stops and the door opens near the Gear bay. The >three of them stepped out of the elevator. Citan (Baby Plucky): Elelator stop. Elelator go aahp! >Emeralda and Maria immediately turned away from each other and >walked to their Gears with out saying a word. Billy could >defiantly feel the air chill by 50 degrees when the ladies >walked away. Fei (Billy; French accent): I fart in your general direction, air chill! >He shook his head in confusion. “What has gotten into those two?” Maria: A pint of coffee ice cream? Oh wait, that's Billy... >Billy pauses for a second. “I know Emeralda loves me…. But why >would she become so jealous now? Emeralda: Because Hanpan said so? >Hum…. Something is going here, (Billy starts running to his >gear as the ship shakes again) and I want to find out!” Billy: o/~ We are looking Emeralda's Clues/ We are looking for Emeralda's clues... o/~ ---------------------------- [Citan's House] A hush fell over the room. /Will there be any more fics today?/ they asked themselves. Billy looked idly at the ceiling where the voice emenated. /I got a baaaad feeling about what she's gonna throw at us next.../ A soft buzz could be heard from above. It was the voice mumbling to herself. "Aw, crap, they used the Fanfic Tranferral System again... Oh dear, they're not ready for this kind of fanfic hurting! I'd better call upon some reinforcements..." --------------------- End... for now. E-mail comments to me at: Lessa990@aol.com Just don't tell Zel or Kumiko where I am... I'm fragile and allergic to pain! O.o;; >There was a pack of giant Wels that pounding on the outside >hull. Season one: ------------------ Episode 101: "Battle of the Strongest" Episode 102: Raging Double Feature ("Wild ARMs Rage" and "Toshinden Rage") Episode 103: "The Cursed Waters" Episode 104: "The Jonathanlizers" Episode 105: "Final Fantasy VII: The Untold Story" part 1 Episode 106: "The Return of Lord Thinker" Episode 107: "Get Rich Quick" spam. Episode 108: "Don't Freak Out" Episode 109a: "The Price of Redemption" parts 1-3 Xenogears interludes: ------------------------- Episode 109b: "The Price of Redemption" parts 4-5 Episode 201a: "Messila's Journey" part 1 Episode 203: "Ash's New Friend" Episode 206: "Emerald Nights" part 1 Episode 207: "Pokemon Gangbang" (MSTed with Hyperonius) Season Two: ---------------- Episode 202: "Why RPGs Should be Severely Censored and Devoid of Character Development" Episode 201b: "Messila's Journey" part 2 Episode 201c: "Mesilla's Journey" part 3 Episode 204: "FFVII: The Untold Story" part 2 Episode 205: "Behind the Scenes" *Coming Soon!* Episode 208: "Beloved? Yeah, Right" Other MSTings: ------------------ Episode 000: "Rebirth" (MSTed with Nick) Episode 001: Stephen Gohan's letter to the GIA (MSTed with Katana Angel) *Coming soon!* Episode 002: "Cloud Vs. Aeris" (MSTed with Nick) *Coming... eventually* Episode 003: "The Happy Spell" (With an assist from Aurora Derall) Lookie, a shameless plug! Organized Chaos! http://www.crosswinds.net/~rinichan My own site. MSTings, Captions, and more! Just beware the mascot, he can lead you to strange things...